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Michael Rand started RandBall with hopes that he could convince the world to love jumpsuits as much as he does. So far, he's only succeeded in using the word "redacted" a lot. He welcomes suggestions, news tips, links of pure genius, and pictures of pets in Halloween costumes here, though he already knows he will regret that last part.

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TFD: Local restaurant to offer Derek Jeter "Lifetime in Hell" as retirement gift

Posted by: Michael Rand Updated July 16th at 10:50am 265744981

jeterhellskitchenWhat do you get the man who has everything? Well, if the man is retiring Yankees shortstop Derek Jeter, one local restaurant thinks that the answer is a Lifetime in Hell.

But they mean it in a good way.

Hell’s Kitchen, a downtown Minneapolis establishment that also provides catering and meals for the Twins and visiting clubhouse at Target Field, will present that very thing to Jeter, according to HK Vice President Pat Forciea.

What does it entail? A “Lifetime in Hell” card granting a free meal at the restaurant for Jeter whenever he is in town. We’re not sure how often he will be here after this year, but you never know.

Forciea said Hell’s Kitchen intends to present the offer, as well as a full gift pack, to the Yankees clubhouse attendant on Friday before the second game of a four-game series between the Twins and Yankees.

There’s a great joke about Jeter and gift baskets waiting to be made, but we’ll leave that to you clever folks in the comments.

For now: Clever idea, Hell’s Kitchen. If your aim was publicity, you earned it.

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